Tiny Habits Add Up to Big Changes

Last week I visited a friend.  When I was leaving I noticed that she had a sticky note on her door that said "breathe."

"You have to remind yourself to breathe?"

She smiled, "It's part of a program I'm doing called 3 Tiny Habits.  I need to remember to breathe throughout the day so I tied the action to something else I do all the time such as opening the door."

I responded, "you are getting kinda groovy" and then went home and looked up the website of BJ Fogg.

Basically the concept is not about changing habits as much as it is about adding new habits.  This concept really resonates with me.  So often in fitness we focus on changing habits or getting rid of bad behaviors.  Instead I encourage my clients to focus on adding new habits such as eating more fruits and veggies, stretching daily and walking on a regular basis.

But the concept of tying these new habits to something you already do was a different way of approaching it.  And by keeping the habits tiny, you are less likely to be overwhelmed by making big changes.  Then after the tiny habit becomes habitual, you can add to it and so on.

So, I've been doing it.  My 3 tiny habits:

After I brush my teeth, I will put away the toothpaste.
After I drink my morning coffee, I will drink a glass of water.
After I use a tissue, I will put it in the trash.

So far I've done pretty well.  I'm mindful throughout the day of my tiny habits.  And once I master them, I plan to build up to putting away more toiletries (my vanity can get kinda cluttered in the morning), drinking more water and clearing out bits of trash.

Give it a try.  Keep it tiny.

Be well.

Everyone Has A Story to Share

For years, after I decided to become a midwife, women have shared with me their birth stories.  The moment I said that either I was studying to become a midwife or that I was practicing as a midwife, the stories came pouring out.  My mother's story of giving birth to me and my brother.  Her mother's story of giving birth to her children.  My grandmother's stories of her mother's births.  My paternal grandmother shared the stories of not only births but losses.  Other women did the same.  Their mother's stories, their stories, their daughter's stories.  Strangers, friends, co-workers.  Everyone wants to talk about this formative human experience.

And I listen.  I smile.  I nod.  I gasp.  I've learned not to say much.  Most women don't want an opinion or feedback.  They just want to let their stories out to breathe and are grateful to find a receptive ear.

Some stories are lovely, some horrible.  Some are heroic, some are hilarious.  Most end with the birth of the most amazing person they have ever met.  A few end in loss and tragedy - a life gone unlived.

But with each ending comes a new chapter and new life stories to be told.

Little did I know that when I became a personal trainer I was taking on the job of hearing new stories. But these are not about births.  Women want to talk about their diets, their friends' diets and their mothers' diets.

I hear about no-carbs, low-carbs, juice fasts, vegetarian, vegan, paleo, points.  I hear about what worked and what didn't work.

I don't mind.  It's part of my job and so I listen.  I nod.  I smile.  I gasp.  But instead of being silent, I offer guidance.

My guidance is simple.  No need for a 400 page book.  No need for complex recipes and food combinations.

Do what works for you.  And if what you are doing, isn't working, change it.  And when you find what works, plan to do it for the rest of your life.

There are lots of books out there about this diet or that diet.  It's a multi-billion dollar industry.  Are carbs bad? Maybe for some but not for others.  Meat? Same thing.  Fat? You guessed it, same thing.  Sugar? Well, best to avoid a bunch of the refined stuff but I'm not going to keep you away from a cupcake at your child's birthday.

It always makes me a bit sad when I'm out somewhere and I hear women talking about dieting.  I think, isn't there something else they could be discussing?  Something that would enrich each other's lives - perhaps a bit of worldly wisdom.  An inspiring book or article?  A beautifully filmed movie?

Or maybe, they could share a few life stories.

Be well.